Seriously, what’s with all the commercials scaring us about how much money a funeral costs? Where does all the cost come in here? Because if it’s stuff that people are pushing on to the bereaved to take advantage or make them feel guilty about refusing, y’all can keep it when I’m gone. These commercials piss me off and make me think of what’s really necessary.
Cremation, with no viewing (aka wake)
Combustible “alternative container” – basically a flannel/cardboard box.
Am I forgetting anything? Honestly, there is no reason you have to pay a facility fee to set me out in a rented coffin for 2-3 days and pretty me up just so I can be incinerated. And don’t let them tell you it’s required to buy one of their overpriced urns. Take me in what comes from the crematorium and put me in whatever or wherever you want. I am sterile and pose absolutely no health hazards at that point, for the first time in life.
Have a memorial service if you must in a nice park led by one of any number of friends who are ordained Internet ministers. Then have a pot luck picnic with good music and lots of laughter. You won’t need an obituary in a paper either – social media gets the word out just fine and in record time.
Some might think that’s terrible, but I don’t see the sense in adding to the living’s pain by dragging this out and causing them a huge bill. That isn’t required of you to show your love for me, I promise. I’m not judging you from beyond. Not unless you let my husband wear one of those tacky, button-down, short sleeved plaid shirts of his.