Me and Moses and Losing My Religion

Happy Easter!   

 Our only Easter tradition these days seems to be watching all the hours of The Ten Commandments (The REAL version with Charlton and Yul) and buying a pile of chocolate for ourselves.  We’re even a holiday behind this year, with corned beef and cabbage in the crockpot.  Maybe we’ll do ham for Cinco de Mayo and have margaritas for The Fourth of July.

Easter always gets me thinking seriously about my religion (or lack thereof) in a way Christmas never does.  Must be the torture and death.  I’m such a bad Catholic now that someone had to remind me what Good Friday was all about.  And thank goodness for that infogram on facebook breaking down the horrors to specific hours.  I know, I know…  But looking from the outside in, Good Friday seems like a really poor choice of titles for the day. I haven’t been to a church service in years that wasn’t tied to a wedding or a funeral.  I don’t consider myself a Catholic anymore, although I was raised that and went through Confirmation and all. Cecelia is the saint name I chose, for those that are curious. Today, I consider myself a human being who tries to be as good as she is able on any given day.  That’s not a religion, that’s just not being a dick.  I’m okay with that.  If we have a higher being I feel they will be okay with that as well.

Organized religion just stopped making sense to me and no one could give me answers that seemed right. It probably happens to most people and then they somehow reconcile and put away thier doubts.  That’s faith?  When something doesn’t make sense but you’re going to believe in it anyway?  Yeah…no.  I couldn’t do it.  It never seemed right that somehow I happened to be part of the “real” religion and everyone else was mistaken and doomed.  I lasted until shortly after confirmation when I finally said this religion stuff was bullshit.  I probably said exactly that, I don’t recall.  But I know what the last straw was, the last stupid little thing that make me think people were totally lying to me about how serious all these rules were that I was brought up with and was supposed to be terrified to go against.   

 
St. Patrick’s Day on a Friday was all it took.

Buffalo has a pretty big Irish population and apparently there was consternation over not being able to eat corned beef on St. Patrick’s day since it was a Friday during Lent.  The Cardinal over the Buffalo area then gave Special Dispensation to eat corned beef that Friday that year.  I went WHAAAT………..?  Suddenly, all these rules of what you could and could not do to avoid going to Hell got pretty hazy. I was out.  I didn’t make a big stink about it but slowly I withdrew from “churchy things” and once I was in college I only went to mass on major holidays to make my mother happy.

I may not be part of a religion on purpose now, but I can’t exactly remove everything I was raised with.  It’s just a bit different these days.  I do believe there was a man named Jesus.  I have a feeling that some stories in the Bible are loosely based on true events and others are completely fabricated to suit the needs of important men. I think Mary Magdalene was far more important than we have been told and might have been Jesus’ wife.  There’s so much we don’t know about that people just have faith in but that’s never been me. 

I just try not to be an asshole.  

 

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About deepfriedyankee

I am a parade of one. A seeker of bathtubmarys. A lover of bacon. I have the patience of a saint - but not any of the saints you've ever heard of.
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3 Responses to Me and Moses and Losing My Religion

  1. Mandy says:

    Amen! Oh wait, is that appropriate for this?

    Mom is still mad that I’m not sending the kids to religious ed. I’d rather they learn about world religions from me. I’m only sorry they won’t appreciate Catholic humor as much as I do. That’s the one thing I do feel I’m robbing them of.

    • I didn’t learn a thing from religion classes, they were a complete waste of time. We goofed off in class and ran around the underground tunnel connecting the school to the church. I learned more about saints and religious teachings from art history classes, tv, and movies. In fact, Nurse Jackie just taught me about St. Augustine because I googled if he really said “make me good God – but not yet”.

      • Mandy says:

        I’m more interested in religion from an academic perspective, I think. I’ve read the Bible from cover to cover just to read it (and be really good at that category on Jeopardy). I read a book about saints for pretty much the same reason. But I didn’t realize that was the part about religion that I liked until taking a couple of courses in college, one required course that included looking at the Bible as literature and one elective that was essentially the history of Christianity and Christian scholars. I still find that stuff super interesting. But it’s also made me less want to actually participate in religion.

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