The Flashing Manifesto


1. If you don’t have a sense of humor, you might not want to continue reading this.
2. I don’t know how much experience you’d need to be called an “expert” in this area, but I don’t claim to be one.  I’m more of a “coach”.
3. This is all my opinion and if you have a different opinion, write your own damn manifesto.
4. Public nudity is a crime in New Orleans, even during Carnival.  Don’t call me to bail you out if you get arrested.
5. You will not find nudity in this post.  Move on if that’s what you’re here for.

Flashing?  What is this “flashing” you speak of?

Generally referring to women lifting their shirts to expose the breasts.  At men.  At women. At whoever. Sometimes for trinkets, to be on camera, or just because they want to.  Flashing can also be done by men unzipping the pants.  Women too can flash the lower half but this is really not advisable for anyone.  We are not going to talk about the lower techniques here.  As stated above, flashing is illegal and a lower-half flash is an excellent way to get arrested and sit in jail until Ash Wednesday.  Keeping in mind that this is illegal and you still want to flash someone while you are enjoying Mardi Gras, this manifesto will help you with ways you can play the bead-trading game in as positive a way possible. By the way, why won’t you get arrested every time you flash?  Several reasons.  Police officers are stretched very thin trying to keep all the Mardi Gras chaos at an acceptable level.  Their major concern with crowd control is keeping everyone safe and healthy. They are looking for pickpockets, people fighting or trying to start a fight, public urination, and other obvious buzz-killers.   Most are willing to let flashing go on to a certain point as long as people aren’t fighting each other to get a look or backing up big crowds where pickpockets get the most work.  Best to do your thing and move on – not cause a traffic jam over your boobs.   The best advice I can give you on avoiding an arrest if you must do this is to not flash around police officers, and certainly don’t do it if an officer has already told you not to.  Seriously – if you do it anyway at that point you deserve to spend some time in jail. Respect the NOPD and all the other law enforcement brought in for the Carnival season.  They work hard for little thanks.  This manifesto assumes that you are wandering the Bourbon Street area in public, jealously staring at people wearing fantastic beads that you MUST have but aren’t about to pay for.  It also assumes that you are a lady with discriminating taste – not some drunk sorority girl about to puke on the Girls Gone Wild cameraman after making out with your sister and yelling “Hi Dad!”

Ladies Demand Quality

There are many levels of beads out there ranging from below-average parade beads to “You want me to what – good luck with that” expensive.  If this is your first Mardi Gras you will want every strand of beads tossed your way and it will blow your mind as you see how many different types there are.  Hopefully, you won’t even see the below-average parade beads because most float riders in parades don’t bother to throw them anymore.  If you have to undo a plastic clasp to put them on, you don’t need those beads.  I don’t mean any disrespect to riders – they pay for those beads they are throwing us and can choose to buy whatever they’d like.  It’s their money and I love them for spending it on us.  Catch all the beads you can at parades and take them home for the kids, but we are talking about beads you are willing to “trade” for (far away from the kids) in this document.  Notice what types of beads are easily available by attending a parade or two. When you see a person on the street or on a balcony offering up beads of that caliber if you will lift your shirt, please pass on the offer.  Ladies Demand Quality!!!  I cannot stress that enough.  You are worth more than that.  I don’t care if your boobs are big or small, perky or pierced, natural or not, they are all lovely and worth quality beads.  What do I mean by quality?  Big beads, long beads, beads with characters strung into them, beads that light up – there are even beads that play music.  By big beads I suggest the beads be the size of a quarter or larger.  Long beads would be ones that hang at least to your waist but to your knees is even better.  Characters could be ANYTHING!  This is the largest selection of what I consider quality.  You’ll never have them all and every year there are new ones to choose from.  The possibilities are endless – rubber duckies, shot glasses, butterflies, parrots, dice, frogs, sports team logos, cartoon characters…I could go on and on and not cover 2% of the possibilities.  Beads that light up and play music are self-explanatory.  Glass beads are even making a comeback; don’t discount them just because they’re small.  And then there are always some specialty items that you might want to trade for, such as Hooter Meter beads (which means you’d have to try on the Hooter Meter and you’ll know it when you see it, trust me), beads with mini bottles of booze from The St. Louis Shot Guys, or a Certificate of Exposure from the Judges set up in the Royal Sonesta bar on Fat Tuesday (again, you’ll recognize them when you see their long white wigs and black robes). Look for the guys with piles of quality beads around their necks.  These men are good guys to deal with!


First, thanks to a great man named Chicago Tim for summing up this whole process as Boobie-Economics.  It’s genius.  At this point we know you are willing to flash for some beads, and you know what types of beads are worth the transaction.  The first flash is the toughest, but after that you’ll wonder what the big deal was all about and get that look of a hunter stalking her prey.  But not everyone you see is someone you want to deal with.  It would be helpful at some point if you read the award-winning (as if) “Field Guide to Mardi Gras Males”, but not essential.  Like many layers of bead quality, there are many layers of bead-trader quality.  As the Sweet Potato Queens say often: “Be Particular”.  You can either trade with people who are on balconies or people right in front of you on the street.  Some people flash at parades and trade with float riders but this is NOT recommended.  You are not on Bourbon Street during a parade and you may be around children.  Those two things make it far more likely that you will be arrested.  I believe most Krewes also tell their float riders that they should not be encouraging flashing, but of course many riders ignore this. Back to Bourbon Street: you have the balconies and you have the guys standing right next to you.  MG flashing virgins may initially feel more comfortable with the idea of flashing someone who is far away on a balcony while they are on the street below.  However, balcony transactions have some serious drawbacks for several reasons.  It’s hard to tell if you are dealing with Bourbon Street Gentlemen or the type who likes to Bait and Switch, by hanging nice beads over a balcony but actually throwing you something else of lesser quality.  Then there’s all the yelling and pointing you have to do to set up a transaction.  Waiting for someone with quality goods to notice you can sometimes be very frustrating (not to mention tough on the ego).  And of course, the longer loud negations go on, the more guys will circle around you with their cameras ready to take pictures of you when the shirt finally does go up.  Now, it’s a fact of Boobie-Economics that photos and videos will be taken.  You’re a fool if you think you won’t be caught on film during a transaction.  But Ladies try to keep that type of exposure to a minimum.  Are all those Freeloaders going to give you any good beads?  Hell no!  There needs to be some give and take in every transaction – not just take. The more people huddled around you, the more likely one will try to grab a little something they have no business touching.  That’s called sexual assault and is inexcusable.  And before people think it: Saying you “asked” to be grabbed because your shirt was up is ridiculous.  Negotiating a transaction on the street with someone is generally faster from start to finish than a balcony transaction, and you get a better feel for if the person is a creep.  Plus, it is possible to complete a transaction quietly and before anyone around the two of you even knows what is going on.   Nothing’s funnier than hearing a “DAMN!” to your side as you put your shirt down and see some dude fumbling with his camera, trying in vain to get some breasts on film.  It’s fun to catch the Freeloaders off guard.

Practice Makes Perfect

Having a good strategy is what separates the Ladies from the Tramps.  And you want to be a Lady, don’t you?  There are some things you may want to practice at home before you get to New Orleans.  They may sound silly now, but practice makes perfect – and willing significant others can’t get enough of your practice.  The most important thing to practice – and the thing flashing newbies have trouble with – is the proper exposure time.  As in: how long does my shirt have to be up?  Long enough.  If you are a speed-flasher, you better be prepared to do it again if you want any beads.  Fair’s fair – let them see what they wanted to see so they will feel it is worth trading their beads.  I don’t mean they are deciding if your chest is good enough to give beads to, so don’t worry about that.  If someone has agreed to the transaction that means they are an admirer of breasts, and while admirers may have their favorites I can assure you that all boobs are good boobs to them.  So you need to work on your timing and a good way to do it is this: Lift the shirt and count to yourself “ONE Mardi Gras, TWO Mardi Gras!” and then put the shirt down (and claim your prize!).  The two-second rule seems to please everyone, including whoever you are practicing with. Once you have the timing down you can work on presentation if you’re really an overachiever.  But even without a shimmy or bounce, you will meet with great success.  Two seconds may feel like forever, but it’s not long enough for many Freeloaders to get the cameras ready, unless they could tell what would happen and prepared ahead of time.  Another aspect of the trade you could practice is your approach.  There – I said it – have I lost some of you?  You should be approaching people with good beads who have good vibes and initiating the trade.  I’m always coaching Ladies who are amazed that they are “allowed” to do the asking, and that’s just sad.  If you want to accumulate you need to initiate!  Don’t give me the shy southern belle crap; men are often just as reluctant to ask the hottie walking by as the hottie is to ask.  The guy doesn’t know if you are a flashing type of gal, but most guys are willing to deal.  What do you ask?  Well, that’s up to you and that’s what you practice.  You could spot something you like and simply ask the person – “Hey, could I have that?”  I think that’s a little greedy but it works because he will counter your offer most likely with a request to flash. Or “Those are nice beads – could I flash you for them?”  I look for guys with piles of great beads on because I know exactly what they are wearing them for.  It’s not their neck and back health.  “Hey, you look like a man who knows how to do some bead trading.  I’m interested in those (point to your favorite) – what do you say?”  Nine out of ten times you will end up with those beads.  The tenth time you’ve picked someone who is a complete idiot because you are fabulous, so just smile sweetly and tell them happy Mardi Gras and move on.  It’s their loss.

The Transaction 

You’ve spotted that set of beads you having been dreaming of (or are jealous of your friend already having).  They are hanging around the neck of someone who looks friendly enough, and doesn’t seem drunk enough to be dangerous.  He doesn’t give you the creeps.  Do you look okay?  You know, lipstick not smeared all over your face, you didn’t just have a hurricane spilled all over you?  Hand your drink to a friend (it’s hard to lift your shirt without spilling your Huge Ass Beer) and put forth your offer to the guy!

With whatever magic words you’ve decided to use here, let’s assume his response is positive.  First, you need to make sure your partner-in-trading is ready for the show.  Many times they want to get the camera ready so allow them a chance to get the camera out and focus where they are going to focus (hint: it ain’t your face so relax). Don’t be standing around looking all sneaky with your hands gripping the bottom of your shirt for 5 minutes while the camera gets ready (that draws attention from Freeloaders).  As with a speed-flash, there’s nothing more annoying than having to re-expose because someone’s camera wasn’t ready.  If you are lucky he’s not carrying a camera around his neck and just wants to see you in action, not record you on film (pretty rare).  That makes things easier because fewer Freeloaders will be tipped off to the impending transaction.

At this point, your posse of bodyguards should be discreetly surrounding you on your left and right sides. The posse normally consists of ladies taking turns with you on the bead-earning circuit and/or some men who don’t get distracted or jealous when you flash (these types of men are rare but wonderful).  They are not only standing in the way of Freeloader cameras, but they are a physical barrier from people who might try to cop a feel.  The key is for them not to be obvious.  They shouldn’t be slapping cameras out of people’s hands and creating a scene like rock star bodyguards, because that is when arrests happen.  Remember, you will be caught on film once in a while and you don’t have to rejoice it, but you have to be okay with it happening.

So you’re totally nervous and details of the deal have been agreed on. Everyone is ready and it’s time for the lift…UP!



Claim you beads!  You can do any necessary readjustment after you get the beads.  In fact, if you are lucky enough to be comfortable going braless, readjustment isn’t even necessary.  Be polite, help him untangle your beads from whatever else he is wearing, smile and say –

“Thanks honey, happy Mardi Gras!”

Now go get yourself some more beads darlin’.

Posted in Humor, Mardi Gras, Travel | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Males of Mardi Gras Field Guide

Quick disclaimer:  All men pictured in this blog post are Certified Bourbon Street Gentlemen, no matter what description they happen to be hanging out by.  You can consider them eye candy.

Extra disclaimer:  I realize the gender binarism to this post.  I write about my experience.

If you frequent the French Quarter for much of your Mardi Gras bead gathering, you can very often spot trouble in its various forms from a mile away.  This trouble – also known as Man – can make or break your festive mood.   Knowing what to expect and who to avoid is half the battle in your war to be the undisputed Bead Queen of this year’s Mardi Gras.  Remember, the idea is to HAVE FUN while gaining every bead your little heart desires and making your friends jealous.  When you stop having fun it’s time for a nap, a drink, or a good meal with friends away from the Bourbon Street scene.  (MG is not a sprint, it is an endurance race.  For more advice on surviving it, try this post  next.)  Not all men are to be avoided of course – who would we get beads from if we did that?  And not all CAN be avoided, but it’s good to be familiar with some of the different types of wildlife out there before you go on safari…


Amateurs: These boys are in over their heads.  They thought that just asking (for anything) was going to get them some action.  They have some dinky throw beads picked up from the street and are hoping to woo the ladies with them.  They don’t understand why no one is interested.  They are not about to spend money on serious beads because that would cut into their Huge Ass Beers budget.  In fact, they are often identified by the double-fisted beers they are clutching.  C’mon – all those Girls Gone Wild tapes watched at the fraternity house make it look so easy to talk women out of their clothes!  They truly believe someone will come back to the hotel room they are sharing with 10 other drunken people and have fantastic group sex.  (No – I am not interested in hearing any stories from people who swear it really happens all the time to them.)  They will go home from this trip remembering very little but making up fantastic stories about all they saw while they were so wasted. They are cute at this stage of development, but sometimes become desperate enough to turn into Coasters, Snatchers, or Grabbers.

Coasters:  Also in the “boys” category, and relatively harmless but irritating.  They know they aren’t going to get any bead transactions with what they have on, but they don’t mind because they’ve found a better way to score some sights.  They are going to share in someone else’s transaction by hanging around with their cameras ready until a Bourbon Street Gentleman makes a deal with someone.  The Coasters shamelessly barge in, often startling the lady who is probably already worried about getting arrested for flashing (like deer during shotgun season, Flashers are easily spooked), and quite possibly ruining the transaction for the people it was meant for.  Coasters can be easily spotted by the large circles they form around people trying to make a covert bead deal, and lifting their cameras over everyone’s heads in the hopes of a breast sighting.  The fortunate thing about Coasters is that they are usually satisfied with this form of entertainment, and are less likely to evolve into something more dangerous.

Cretins: If breasts are the celebrities of Bourbon Street (and many think they are), Cretins are the paparazzi.  They refuse to wear the usual Mardi Gras camouflage of beads, beer, and point & shoot digital cameras.  They carry large, professional camera equipment including a zoom lens and absolutely no beads whatsoever.  They would much rather follow people with good beads, or ladies who are on the hunt for them than do the necessary work themselves.  This saves them the embarrassment of having to talk to women, and the possibility of being turned down.  Their argument is that anything happening in a public area is fair game to photograph and that is absolutely true.  However, it’s bad form to refuse to play the bead-trading game, and no fun at all.  Boobie-Economics depends on the social graces of give and take, not just Take.


Snatchers:  There are two classes of Mardi Gras Males that really know how to ruin a good time.  Unfortunately, both of these groups are often hard to spot until it is too late.  Snatchers enjoy hanging out below balconies to demonstrate their incredible jumping and stretching abilities while stealing beads from those they were intended for.  They have no interest in the beads themselves, and it’s even more satisfying if the beads break in the process.  The only purpose is to ruin someone’s day.  Or, to put it into Mardi Gras terms, to pee on someone’s parade.  Sometimes it seems as though Snatchers come out of nowhere, but the trained eye can spot trouble by looking for antsy young men who are anxiously scanning the balcony, and do not seem interested in the escapades being flaunted around them. While it is impossible to defend against all Snatchers, a group of loyal Bourbon Street Gentleman can often greatly reduce these occurrences and all smart ladies should keep a few around in case of emergencies. Some Snatchers are also mutations that share common lowlights with the Grabber.


Grabbers:  Nothing ruins a good time like a Grabber.  There you are, happily making a bead trade, when suddenly a hand comes out of nowhere and helps itself to some skin.  Totally unacceptable and legally sexual assault.  And sexual assault trumps indecent exposure on the list of Mardi Gras no-no’s any day of the week.  These are not negotiated feels; they are from desperate, dangerous and often drunk strangers.  Mouths have also been known to show up when least expected.  The best defense in this case is a good offense.  Another reason to have allies around during a trade, and they should be paying more attention to crowd control than the trade itself.  I’ve never been threatened with arrest for batting away hands and shoving faces back two feet with an open palm.  And although I wouldn’t ever advise serious violence as a way to solve issues, Grabbers (along with their cousins the Snatchers) are really testing the patience of others with less restraint than I have.

Bait & Switchers:  Often suffering from low self-esteem, Bait & Switchers can primarily be found on private balconies, where they know you can’t come up and kick their asses.  They typically work in pairs.  Two guys with great beads hanging on the railings in front of them.  They ignore everyone begging for good beads as they scan the crowd for a hot blonde in the distance (who usually is not interested).  These men can be dealt with as individuals – if you can catch their eye and point to what you want there might be a chance – but only if the partner is not paying attention!!!  Nine times out of ten, the agreement will be made, the flash will occur, and the B&S #2 will catch the end of the flash, realize what’s going on, and keep B&S #1 from giving away the good beads that you asked for.  They will throw you crap beads instead.  If a lady’s luck is really bad, a freakin’ Snatcher will come along and steal the crap beads.  This is your cue to take a break and get a drink. There are no surefire ways to deal with this type of scummy situation – ya lifts yer shirt and ya takes yer chances, so to speak.

Bourbon Street Gentlemen:  Good guys with good beads.  Prince Charming in a sea of Shrek.  These guys are reasonable and pleasant to deal with, leaving everyone satisfied.  They are respectful of the lady and usually only ask to wait until they have their cameras ready.  Many will give the beads right up front, and they never bait & switch.  Often, if they are approaching someone who refuses, they will give some beads anyway and say “Happy Mardi Gras”.  Ladies, these are men we can do business with.  In fact, when coaching MG virgins who are interested in Boobie-Economics, we seek them out for a positive experience.  Look for the men with stacks of excellent, colorful beads weighing them down.  They are often able to stand upright because they are not drinking as much as others in order to appreciate the trading experience.  Friends with the Bourbon Street Gentleman should also be wearing similar items and showing similar appreciation, and although it is unnecessary to acquire good beads from each one, it is certainly a bonus. Hallmark of a Bourbon Street Gentleman (and a good bead trade altogether):  a sincere “Thank You”.

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FOOD: Easy Dutch Oven Bread


A few years ago I posted a recipe for bread and it was my go-to…but it didn’t always come out that well.  Part was the ingredient ratio, part was getting a good amount of steam while cooking and part was probably not letting the dough rise way beyond what the recipe suggested.  I recently found something similar and easier, and I get a good excuse to bake in my little 2.5 quart dutch oven!  This can also be made in a larger dutch oven; I think most people probably have a 5-6 quart size if they’ve got one at all, but it makes a slightly more oval loaf instead of round.  Great flavor, crusty on the outside and soft on the inside.

Mix with a whisk in a medium-large bowl:

  • 3 c. flour (all purpose, or 1/2 AP and half bread flour)
  • 2 tsp. salt
  • 1 packet dry active yeast

Add warm water – I usually use @1 3/4 cups but you might want to start with 1 1/2 cups and see if you like that consistency.  I like my dough a bit on the wetter side.

Cover tightly with plastic wrap and set somewhere out of the way…FOR HOURS AND HOURS.  Seriously, I usually do this at night before bed and then I can bake bread the next morning, or even leave it until I get home from work the next day. Then:

Turn oven to 450 and put your dutch oven in (including lid) to preheat.

Turn out your dough onto a floured piece of parchment paper, cover with plastic wrap and let sit 30 minutes while the oven warms.  I find it’s easier to put the parchment paper in a bowl about the size of my D.O. and cover with plastic wrap.  Then I don’t have all the dough sticking to the plastic.  After 30 minutes I just lift the paper & dough out of the bowl and pop it in the hot D.O.

Put the lid on and put it in the oven for @35-40 minutes (I do 40, depends on your oven).

At 40 minutes, I took the lid off for another 5 minutes.  The idea is to brown the top, but really, my little loaf was already browned because it filled up the D.O. nicely and touched the lid while baking.  Trial and error.

Done!  Lift paper and bread out and dump bread onto a rack to cool!

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FOOD: Sick day Soup

Have one of those people this week with a questionable stomach who refuses to stop eating all the spicy holiday snacks because they hate bland food?  Try this soup for them, tailoring the broth and protein to what you have on hand.  I used beef broth (okay, boullion cubes) because I had a bit of leftover Christmas Eve steak I chopped – after scraping off all the Montreal steak seasoning I could from it. This recipe makes 2-4 servings, depending on how hungry/daring your sick folk are.

  • 4 cups broth/boullion
  • steak or chicken (optional but SOMEONE must have meat or it doesn’t count as a meal)
  • 1 cup brown rice
  • 2 stalks celery
  • 2 carrots
  • 1/2 onion
  • 2 tbsp minced garlic (more or less, I like more)

Heat 1-2 tablespoons oil (I used peanut) in a big pot; I have one of those big cast iron enameled Dutch oven pots with a lid. Looks like the fancy expensive brand but it’s not.  Works just the same, imagine that!

Chop the onion well (I used sweet yellow) and saute it in the hot oil for a few minutes, reducing it and doing some caramelization. Just before you think you’re done, throw in the garlic.  If you don’t keep a jar of minced garlic in your house at all times, I don’t think we can be friends.

Do not let the garlic burn! Just stir it around a minute and then add the broth and the rice. Stir, and add protein if you are putting any in. Turn the heat down to a simmer.   I let that simmer for probably 45-60 minutes tonight because I had time, even though it overcooks the rice.  I added chopped celery and carrots for the last half hour. That made them nice and hot but still a little crunchy.

By the time we were ready to eat, the rice was mushy (which I think is a good thing for an upset stomach) the veggies still had crunch and it all had a good flavor without anything super spicy and potentially irritating like cumin or pepper. It was a thick soup because of the rice but if you want a soupier soup you could always add more liquid while cooking.

All in all, it was a non-irritating soup for the stomach and tasted good enough for healthy people to enjoy. It got the seal of approval from Nauseous McCrankypants which is a rare and wonderful thing so I thought I’d better write this down so I remember what worked!

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Rage Against the Holiday Gift Exchange

A newish co-worker leaned over yesterday in a meeting and quietly asked a question about the gift exchange my division does at the holiday party.  “I don’t play that game, I hate it,” I told him – perhaps a bit too bluntly because he looked at me like he had made a mistake or perhaps like I eat kittens for breakfast.  Some explanation was in order.

I don’t care for gift exchange games.  Nobody’s on the same page about what kind of gift to bring, everyone argues over the rules of the game, and there are always people disappointed by the outcome.   I know, it’s just a GAME and it’s meant to be fun and not taken seriously.  I don’t find it funny when I spend money on a gift and bring home crap that’s going straight to Goodwill.  Or when I pick something nice and my friendly co-worker steals it from me.  Someone recently told me a story about a gift exchange where she unwrapped an empty box, and everyone laughed and laughed like it was the funniest thing ever.  That sucks.


I wish people could just get their gift exchange shit together, and not treat this as an opportunity to unload junk you have been too lazy to donate.  As a fan of de-cluttering, this is one of those activities it’s easy for me to back away from.  Yes, I’m the one person sitting among 40 or so not playing, but I am snacking and visiting with co-workers just the same and having a fine morning NOT getting angry that my gift has been stolen for the third time and now the only thing left for me is the VHS tape of George of the Jungle that reappears every year.

A “White elephant” is defined as a possession that is useless or troublesome.  Why don’t we stop encouraging that and have GOOD gift exchanges?  Come on – you see what the coveted gifts are every year.  Why are we not all bringing those things and everybody goes home happy?  How about don’t shop at Spencer’s for a gift?  How about not having a full page of rules and instructions on how to play?  How about just bringing:

  • Chocolate
  • Booze
  • Scratch-off instant lottery tickets
  • Whatever is a coveted food item in your area: a box of Krispy Kreme, a bottle of Frank’s Red Hot sauce, Biscoff cookie butter, etc…

WAIT you say – What about that person who is a recovering alcoholic, has a lot of food allergies and thinks gambling is a sin?  They can swap out their gift for that George of the Jungle tape we’ll be keeping in the back for just such an emergency.  Or that coffee mug filled with generic hard candies wrapped in red and green foil, because I’m sure you need another coffee mug.  Hint: NO ONE NEEDS ANOTHER COFFEE MUG.

Please, please, people who get the unenviable task of putting together their office holiday party, set some gift exchange ground rules to make it suck less.  I know there will always be that one asshole who insists they need to carry on the tradition of passing off that Yanni cassette to some poor celebrant who was hoping for a Godiva bar, and that’s not your fault.  At least you tried and I for one appreciate it.

Posted in holidays, Humor, Life, Student Affairs | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Easy Consent Primer

My Facebook news feed runneth over with opinions and outrage over the recent light sentencing of the Stanford student found guilty on three counts of sexual assault.  I won’t rehash that – You’ve read plenty already I’m sure.  So many things to be angry about here like white privilege,  rape culture, binge drinking, inability to accept blame for one’s actions, consent and what it is or is not.

As someone who works with students in a university setting, all the arguments and excuses that come up during a sexual assault investigation are familiar to me.  I think what makes this crime really dig into my heart is that SO MANY of them are in this case.  This is like a case study to end all case studies when it comes to how certain types of people are able to get out of horrible things and somehow continue to remain completely oblivious to the wreckage they leave in their wake.  Part of my job is to educate the students in my care, and we all know simple can sometimes work best for busy folks with short attention spans.  Therefore, to assist everyone who finds themselves in the same confused and deluded boat, trying to sail away from responsibility on the river of Denial, I bring you a short primer on what to remember when you find yourself on top of a person who is unconscious (BESIDES quickly getting help to make sure they are okay).  Feel free to use as necessary.


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24 Things Women Over 30 Should Wear

This morning, as I was perusing  my Facebook timeline, I happened upon an article that a lovely friend shared. It was entitled “24 Things Women Should Stop Wearing After Age 30”, a…

Source: 24 Things Women Over 30 Should Wear

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